Everyone wants to be loved in a marriage, but couples often struggle with emotional neglect. Emotional neglect is one of the most challenging issues many married couples have difficulty overcoming, yet its symptoms and causes are often subtly hidden and ignored until, eventually, the walls between two people build up so high they can no longer bridge them.
If you’ve been feeling emotionally neglected in your marriage or if you want to better understand how emotional neglect might be damaging your and another person’s relationship dynamics, we will provide some insight into **Why Do Some Marriages Suffer From Emotional Neglect?** By looking at the subtle signs and indicators, as well as digging deeper into possible root causes.
What is Emotional Neglect?
Emotional neglect is a form of emotional abuse in which one partner either withdraws from expressing or showing emotion, fails to understand and acknowledge their spouse’s feelings, or actively dismisses them.
It can manifest in several ways, such as not being present emotionally for your spouse, not recognizing how your words and actions negatively impact your spouse, or simply not providing the emotional connection and support your spouse needs. When left unchecked, this can lead to a breakdown in communication, trust, intimacy, and even affection between the couple.
Causes of Emotional Neglect in a Marriage
Resentment
Resentment can build in a marriage when one partner feels taken for granted or unappreciated. Resentment often leads to emotional neglect, as the person may feel that their feelings are ignored or overlooked completely.
Unresolved Issues
If couples have not dealt with issues from past relationships or events, it can lead to emotional neglect. Unresolved issues can cause one or both partners to become guarded and unwilling to emotionally connect with the other person, creating emotional distance between them.
Insecurity
Insecurities and feelings of inadequacy can also cause emotional neglect in marriage. When someone feels insecure, they tend to withdraw from their partner and shut down emotionally, leading to the other person feeling neglected. Insecurity in a marriage can often lead to feelings of jealousy and possessiveness, as one partner may become overly protective or try to control the other.
Partners need open communication and honest conversations about their needs and feelings to prevent emotional neglect due to insecurity. Having someone you can trust and rely on emotionally can help both partners feel more secure and less likely to neglect each other.
Fear Of Intimacy
Sometimes, one or both partners may fear intimacy, leading to emotional neglect in marriage. Someone afraid of being vulnerable with their spouse may not share their feelings or even recognize them within themselves. Fear of intimacy can create a disconnect between the couple, leading to one partner feeling neglected or overlooked.
Stress And Anxiety
Stress and anxiety can cause someone to withdraw from their spouse emotionally, resulting in neglect. When someone is stressed or anxious about something, they may be unable to emotionally connect with their partner and even push them away.
Work Pressure
Work pressure, especially when one partner works long hours or travels for business, can lead to emotional neglect in marriage. When a spouse is constantly away from home, the other person feels disconnected and neglected, impacting their relationship dynamic.
Lack Of Communication
Failing to communicate with your spouse about your feelings can lead to emotional neglect. If one partner is not open and honest about their emotions, the other person may feel neglected or ignored, affecting their relationship dynamic.
Lack Of Self-Awareness
Finally, a lack of self-awareness in either partner can lead to emotional neglect. With the ability to recognize how your actions impact your spouse and vice versa, it can be easy to bridge any emotional distance between the couple.
Unmet Expectations
When couples enter a marriage, they bring with them certain expectations of how the relationship should be. When these expectations are not met, it can lead to frustration and disappointment, manifesting in emotional neglect.
Unmet expectations may include a lack of communication, an unequal division of labor or responsibility, or conflicting priorities – all things that could lead to one partner feeling neglected by the other.
Not listening to you or taking your side
If one partner constantly prioritizes their needs over the other’s or does not take an active interest in what they say, it can lead to emotional neglect. Not listening to you often happens when one partner believes their opinion is the only one that matters or if they think their spouse will agree with them regardless of how they feel about a particular issue. This behavior can damage a relationship and should be addressed immediately.
Don’t Be a Victim of Emotional Neglect
Emotional neglect can take a toll on a marriage, and it is important to recognize the signs and seek help if you are in an emotionally neglected relationship. If your partner does not show interest in or value your feelings, it may be time to reach out for professional support.
Talking with a counselor or therapist can help couples become more aware of their behavior and how it affects each other – allowing them to build a stronger, healthier relationship based on mutual respect and understanding.
Be Proactive
It is also important for couples to be proactive in their efforts to prevent emotional neglect from occurring. Being open and honest about your feelings, spending quality time together, and being willing to compromise can all help couples foster an emotionally healthy relationship and work through any difficulties that may arise. Additionally, ensure you take care of yourselves by engaging in self-care activities.
More interest in friends or family members than in spouse
When one partner is more interested in spending time with their friends or family than their spouse, the other can feel neglected. More interest in friends could take the form of preferring to talk about or discuss topics related to people other than their partner, not engaging in conversations about shared interests or experiences, or being generally preoccupied with other people instead of their spouse.
FAQS
Is emotional neglect a reason for divorce?
The answer to this question will depend on the individual circumstances of each couple. Suppose a person feels neglected in their marriage due to an issue such as emotional neglect. In that case, it can be beneficial for them to speak with a counselor or therapist about how to best address the problem and whether or not divorce is the right option.
Why stay in a loveless marriage?
Some people may choose to stay in a loveless marriage for various reasons, such as financial security or for the sake of their children. However, it is important to remember that living in an emotionally neglected relationship can have long-term consequences, and it can be beneficial to seek professional help to work through any difficulties you may be facing.
How do you live with an unloving spouse?
Living with an unloving spouse can be a challenging and emotionally taxing experience. It is important to remember that you do not have to suffer in silence, and there are steps you can take to improve the situation, such as seeking professional help or talking openly about your feelings with your partner.
Conclusion
Our discussion shows that emotional neglect in marriages is a common issue and must be addressed because it can lead to further negative outcomes. After recognizing signs of emotional neglect, planning for the best possible resolution when communicating with your partner is important. It’s essential to remember that while there are many reasons why marriages suffer from emotional neglect, ultimately, it comes down to communication and validation. If both partners remember that each person has feelings, needs, and desires that should be given importance, then the chances of a healthy relationship are much greater.
